Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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