oh god the rape fog is back!
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I'm too high and old for this...
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
