k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
You are a genius and a whore.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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