"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
