Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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