He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
