I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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