If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
