Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Just high enough for therapy.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
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