Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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