is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old