Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
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Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
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There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.