No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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