i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Ketchup is God's man juice
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize