NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
