We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
how drunk are you?
Several
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
