Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
how does that bad decision feel?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize