I wannas sexs uuuuu
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
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