My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
