Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
