my sisters under your porch take her home
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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