You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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