I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize