can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize