If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
