Define "chronic" masturbator.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
