He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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