in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
