chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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