omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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