I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
There's always time for handjobs
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
