woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
