hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
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