pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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