u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Randomize
