You work out of a Hotel?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises