Texts From Last Night

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  (614): View more from Ohio

  Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?

  (1-614): View more from Ohio

  condoms and good judgment

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Can I buy both of those at the same store?

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  (614): Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice? (1-614): condoms and good judgment (614): Can I buy both of those at the same store? http://tfl.nu/qy9b
  Replies (0) Good night (4116) Bad night (695)
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  (916): View more from California

  and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse

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  (916): and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse http://tfl.nu/0v20
  Replies (12) Good night (4885) Bad night (1338)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.

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  (910): We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works. http://tfl.nu/uib3
  Replies (45) Good night (5921) Bad night (1373)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.

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  (973): you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere. http://tfl.nu/70ri
  Replies (32) Good night (1384) Bad night (5291)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes

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  (410): i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes http://tfl.nu/11ee
  Replies (13) Good night (2169) Bad night (3088)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift

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  (614): the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift http://tfl.nu/dh45
  Replies (19) Good night (4355) Bad night (1406)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.

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  (540): Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house. http://tfl.nu/gobb
  Replies (7) Good night (1567) Bad night (1006)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20

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  (651): I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20 http://tfl.nu/s3lf
  Replies (3) Good night (2184) Bad night (948)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.

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  (307): this is worse than the time i threw up a condom. http://tfl.nu/98sx
  Replies (15) Good night (967) Bad night (5064)
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  (607): View more from New York

  I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.

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  (607): I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable. http://tfl.nu/31u9
  Replies (9) Good night (567) Bad night (1549)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.

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  (615): i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado. http://tfl.nu/rfln
  Replies (11) Good night (1742) Bad night (707)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.

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  (303): He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night. http://tfl.nu/mkun
  Replies (7) Good night (907) Bad night (1422)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays

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  (314): Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays http://tfl.nu/dq5p
  Replies (3) Good night (623) Bad night (447)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.

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  (678): Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are. http://tfl.nu/af34
  Replies (4) Good night (814) Bad night (399)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...

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  (206): you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night... http://tfl.nu/tmlo
  Replies (3) Good night (724) Bad night (359)

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