ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize