Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
