I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
