Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Randomize
