lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
