I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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