please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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