Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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