Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
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