There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Say something about gay babies.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
