try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
P.S. I can't hear my feet
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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