I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
