You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
You're a waste of cheezeits
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
