I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
