I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
farters have to be the big spoon...
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
