new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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